My intention was to sign off on this daily blog with nothing but gratitude and positive messages. Then, I opened the paper this morning and found a horrifying obituary. Father to one of our Quest leaders. Husband to a member of the Black Apron Brigade for musical. Only 58. Steve heard the rescue call yesterday morning of a man shot, but never connected the address to this family. It is heartwrenching and I know the family will never be the same.
Although I am terribly sad tonight, I also recognize that I have so much to be grateful for. Events like this remind me both of my good fortune and how fragile life is. Until Nov. 8, this was an amazing year, especially for me personally.
After eight years of hard labor, I finished my book. It may seem strange to place that item at the top of my list, but it's my accomplishment. Not something I am or have borne or my status or job. The book represents my work, my effort, my thoughts, my experiences, my life. I've had plenty of help along the way and certainly could not have done it without my husband and my friends in Penelope and all the folks who have participated in Quest over the last 28 years.
My three wonderful sons and incredible daughter-in-law are our greatest blessings. We always joke that they are happy, healthy, employed and insured. But, it's true. They've all been through very tough times, but succeeded. They worked hard to get where they are and we're very proud of them.
Besides our domestic trips to California, NYC, Columbus and New Jersey, we took two amazing foreign trips this year. The first one to Scotland with the family was a delight. The trip to Australia celebrated our 45th wedding anniversary. We are incredibly fortunate. So many friends have been widowed or divorced. Our 45 years are an extraordinary accomplishment.
Although my joints are wearing thin and painful, I am healthy, with enough strength to backpack 50 miles and swim 117 miles in a summer. Thirty-two of my classmates have not made it this far, so I know how fortunate I am.
I have decided not to end the blog completely. I'll post once or twice a week, especially when I have updates on the publication of the book. It's been quite a valuable exercise and I'm thankful I gave blogging a try. Farewell!
Saturday, December 31, 2016
Friday, December 30, 2016
Day 1820: Progress
I'm working toward establishing concrete goals and priorities for the coming year and today made significant progress. Several things I read today have made an impact.
Evan posted his goals for 2017:
"-Swim more, climb more
-Learn Portuguese, read Swedish
-Finish Young/Confused
-Take more chances on, with and for people
-Fail faster
-Don't despair
It's not a different world tomorrow morning unless you make it one."
It's the last two lines that hit hardest. I'm moving beyond despair by changing elements in my life that I can control in order to help make the world a better place and I can do that more effectively if I become a better person. I don't think I can swim any more than the 117 miles I did in 2016, but I can exercise more. I don't plan to learn a new language, but I do intend to improve my use of language, be more present and engaged, ask more thoughtful questions and reach out to others.
One important change is to cut down on social media and internet use. Today I also read Andrew Sullivan's essay in the New York Magazine titled, "I Used to Be a Human Being," which is a thought-provoking piece about people's total absorption in smartphones, using them for constant shots of dopamine from the instantaneous responses to their comments. DT is an addict and there are millions more. The article reinforced what I've been thinking, but of course it was far more eloquent and supported by concrete evidence.
One of the most disturbing things about this campaign is the lack of truth, substance, ideas and dialogue. Posts on social media can't solve any problems. People keep talking past each other. I want to understand different viewpoints. I want to read books of substance and have more personal conversations with people who think deeply, read widely and challenge my thinking. It distresses me that I have forgotten so much of the history I once read voraciously, analyzed and taught. So, I'm going to change my habits and spend my time growing, learning, writing and taking action.
Evan posted his goals for 2017:
"-Swim more, climb more
-Learn Portuguese, read Swedish
-Finish Young/Confused
-Take more chances on, with and for people
-Fail faster
-Don't despair
It's not a different world tomorrow morning unless you make it one."
It's the last two lines that hit hardest. I'm moving beyond despair by changing elements in my life that I can control in order to help make the world a better place and I can do that more effectively if I become a better person. I don't think I can swim any more than the 117 miles I did in 2016, but I can exercise more. I don't plan to learn a new language, but I do intend to improve my use of language, be more present and engaged, ask more thoughtful questions and reach out to others.
One important change is to cut down on social media and internet use. Today I also read Andrew Sullivan's essay in the New York Magazine titled, "I Used to Be a Human Being," which is a thought-provoking piece about people's total absorption in smartphones, using them for constant shots of dopamine from the instantaneous responses to their comments. DT is an addict and there are millions more. The article reinforced what I've been thinking, but of course it was far more eloquent and supported by concrete evidence.
One of the most disturbing things about this campaign is the lack of truth, substance, ideas and dialogue. Posts on social media can't solve any problems. People keep talking past each other. I want to understand different viewpoints. I want to read books of substance and have more personal conversations with people who think deeply, read widely and challenge my thinking. It distresses me that I have forgotten so much of the history I once read voraciously, analyzed and taught. So, I'm going to change my habits and spend my time growing, learning, writing and taking action.
Thursday, December 29, 2016
Day 1819: Flakes a flying!
A study in contrasts:
Met with a mom and her son for Quest this morning. She lost her dad last week and missed all the meetings because of his deteriorating condition. Certainly a legitimate reason. Her son was impressive. He was fully engaged in my presentation, asked questions, examined the schedule, made comments. A delight! It was totally worthwhile to spend the extra time and I'm sure he will be a stellar member of our expedition.
Tomorrow morning, I will meet with another mom at Tim Horton's. She wasn't sure she'd be able to get her son out of bed to attend, even though he missed the student meeting. She had planned to come to the last parent meeting, but "something came up." She was supposed to come today, but she forgot and scheduled another event. And she works two jobs. Plus, she couldn't get her ex-husband to attend. Tough for the child to have parents juggling so many responsibilities. Hope the boy will enroll cause it sounds like he needs Quest.
Spent many hours thinking and writing about my plans for the future. Found another publisher that I will try. Made lists of tasks to complete, identified problem areas and goals. I just know that I can't act like nothing has happened. I must assess every activity for its merits and evaluate whether this is how best to spend my time. That's the central point I keep returning to. How will I spend the remaining time I have left on this earth?
The blog is nearing its conclusion. A few more days of writing and posting photos. I recognize that I spend a tremendous amount of time on this outlet and think it could be spent more wisely and productively. The blog has served many purposes. It disciplined me to write every day in a public forum. I was highly conscious of having an audience so I crafted each passage, moderated my language and edited my thoughts. All in all, it's been a valuable process that has contributed to the successful completion of my book.
Met with a mom and her son for Quest this morning. She lost her dad last week and missed all the meetings because of his deteriorating condition. Certainly a legitimate reason. Her son was impressive. He was fully engaged in my presentation, asked questions, examined the schedule, made comments. A delight! It was totally worthwhile to spend the extra time and I'm sure he will be a stellar member of our expedition.
Tomorrow morning, I will meet with another mom at Tim Horton's. She wasn't sure she'd be able to get her son out of bed to attend, even though he missed the student meeting. She had planned to come to the last parent meeting, but "something came up." She was supposed to come today, but she forgot and scheduled another event. And she works two jobs. Plus, she couldn't get her ex-husband to attend. Tough for the child to have parents juggling so many responsibilities. Hope the boy will enroll cause it sounds like he needs Quest.
Spent many hours thinking and writing about my plans for the future. Found another publisher that I will try. Made lists of tasks to complete, identified problem areas and goals. I just know that I can't act like nothing has happened. I must assess every activity for its merits and evaluate whether this is how best to spend my time. That's the central point I keep returning to. How will I spend the remaining time I have left on this earth?
The blog is nearing its conclusion. A few more days of writing and posting photos. I recognize that I spend a tremendous amount of time on this outlet and think it could be spent more wisely and productively. The blog has served many purposes. It disciplined me to write every day in a public forum. I was highly conscious of having an audience so I crafted each passage, moderated my language and edited my thoughts. All in all, it's been a valuable process that has contributed to the successful completion of my book.
Wednesday, December 28, 2016
Day 1818: Catnip Capers
Our first staff meeting for the new musical, Footloose!
It should be a really fun show. Set in the the 1980s, it has lots of dancing and humor, and no death scenes. The costumes should be easier because we can draw from the vast racks we've collected over the years for other shows. The sets, however, are very involved. Next Wednesday is the first rehearsal and we'll begin the measuring. Then, the next three months will be very busy.
Paddy discovered catnip in Sandy's purse and dove in to claim it!
Tuesday, December 27, 2016
Day 1817: Empty house, aching heart
Early this morning, I hugged my sons close and told them to remain hopeful and embrace the joy in life. Their father held them tight and told them we love them. Then they were gone. All day I've had a huge lump in my throat, but I was able to shake off the sadness by late afternoon and tackle the mountains of towels and sheets. There's nothing like laundry to restore normalcy to life.
All the mechanical tasks free my mind to consider the future. What are my next steps forward? I'm reconsidering my priorities and how to manage my time. The events since the election and our conversations about the state of the nation over the past few days have made me think deeply about possible courses of action. Still thinking....
For a special gift for the family, over the last month I made a movie from sixteen years of digital photos of our adventures together. I told them that's what they get when their mother is a sentimental sop and an historian. The movie elicited lots of laughter, hoots and tears. I wanted them to see how important family is, that they are deeply loved and that we will always be present for them. I highlighted the traditions, holidays, travels, passions, friends, fun and values we share. It's a work in progress that I can add to over the next year by going back through childhood photos. It was a delight to produce and so much fun to share.
All the mechanical tasks free my mind to consider the future. What are my next steps forward? I'm reconsidering my priorities and how to manage my time. The events since the election and our conversations about the state of the nation over the past few days have made me think deeply about possible courses of action. Still thinking....
For a special gift for the family, over the last month I made a movie from sixteen years of digital photos of our adventures together. I told them that's what they get when their mother is a sentimental sop and an historian. The movie elicited lots of laughter, hoots and tears. I wanted them to see how important family is, that they are deeply loved and that we will always be present for them. I highlighted the traditions, holidays, travels, passions, friends, fun and values we share. It's a work in progress that I can add to over the next year by going back through childhood photos. It was a delight to produce and so much fun to share.
Our zombie family photo!
Monday, December 26, 2016
Day 1816: Last day of gluttony
The alarm rang at 4 am, but we were already awake. Overhead, we could hear Colin and April packing up for their departure. The thruway was deeply dark with very little traffic and as we traveled north to the airport, the wind picked up as a warm front passed through. We made it there very quickly. They use only carry on luggage and their boarding passes are on their phones. Plus, they have TSA pre-approval, so there was no time to linger over goodbyes. In no time at all, their nine days of vacation were over and they were flying westward again.
You would think I would be used to the departures by now, after all our kids are 40, 37, 33 and 30. But, I'm not. It nearly cuts my heart out to let go one more time. We will see them for sure in July, but the rest of the year is uncertain. April's twin sister is having a baby in May and so Denver will be their destination for much of the year. I hope we can visit them in April during spring break.
We were home by 6:30 and did nap a bit in the morning upon our return. The rest of the family was still sleeping. Tomorrow morning, they'll pack up and drive back to NYC. I hope we can see them in the spring, but that's uncertain, too. Backpacking and musical occupy so many weekends that it's hard to escape.
So, we spent a quiet day visiting, walking and watching Harry Potter films. Why not? The themes parallel our current times. My sons are not hopeful about the future and that scares me. As an eternal optimist, I am battling their cynicism but have a creeping sensation that they are correct about DT setting off a global catastrophe.
We ate leftovers all day and I took stock of all we had consumed since they arrived. I had cooked a fifteen pound turkey last Sunday for Penelope, and there was about three pounds of that left for Colin and April. Then once the rest arrived, our family and guests consumed six pounds of pork, two pounds of bacon, four pounds of roast beef, an eight pound ham, four dozen eggs, four dozen rolls, six dozen cookies, six bottles of wine, a couple six packs of beer and cider, salads, veggies, potatoes, pancakes and lots of snacks. And I cooked all of it! Guess what? I'm tired.
Nearly all the supplies are now depleted and that's ok cause dieting starts tomorrow.
I am incredibly grateful for the time we've had together. They feel rested, relaxed and recharged for the coming challenges of the days ahead.
You would think I would be used to the departures by now, after all our kids are 40, 37, 33 and 30. But, I'm not. It nearly cuts my heart out to let go one more time. We will see them for sure in July, but the rest of the year is uncertain. April's twin sister is having a baby in May and so Denver will be their destination for much of the year. I hope we can visit them in April during spring break.
We were home by 6:30 and did nap a bit in the morning upon our return. The rest of the family was still sleeping. Tomorrow morning, they'll pack up and drive back to NYC. I hope we can see them in the spring, but that's uncertain, too. Backpacking and musical occupy so many weekends that it's hard to escape.
So, we spent a quiet day visiting, walking and watching Harry Potter films. Why not? The themes parallel our current times. My sons are not hopeful about the future and that scares me. As an eternal optimist, I am battling their cynicism but have a creeping sensation that they are correct about DT setting off a global catastrophe.
We ate leftovers all day and I took stock of all we had consumed since they arrived. I had cooked a fifteen pound turkey last Sunday for Penelope, and there was about three pounds of that left for Colin and April. Then once the rest arrived, our family and guests consumed six pounds of pork, two pounds of bacon, four pounds of roast beef, an eight pound ham, four dozen eggs, four dozen rolls, six dozen cookies, six bottles of wine, a couple six packs of beer and cider, salads, veggies, potatoes, pancakes and lots of snacks. And I cooked all of it! Guess what? I'm tired.
Nearly all the supplies are now depleted and that's ok cause dieting starts tomorrow.
I am incredibly grateful for the time we've had together. They feel rested, relaxed and recharged for the coming challenges of the days ahead.
I gave each of the kids a copy of my book, "Molly's First Christmas," just in case this is her last Christmas. She got plenty of loving while they were home.
Sunday, December 25, 2016
Saturday, December 24, 2016
Friday, December 23, 2016
Day 1813: Bats in the Belfry!
After a long, lovely evening of catching up, everyone finally crashed about midnight. A short while later, Colin and April came home from visiting with friends and I felt the ease that a mother knows when all her kids are safely home under her roof. Steve was already asleep and I soon followed.
Then crash, a pounding on the door. I bolted from bed and ran to the door. "There's a bat in Evan's room!" three voices announced. What? Bats? In the winter? How on earth did that get inside?
I threw on jeans and a fleece and headed upstairs. There's Evan wrapped in a blanket. Colin had quickly taken out the storm windows and opened the windows, hoping the bat would fly out. Evan had been awakened by flapping over head and slid from bed encased in his blanket.
A strategy session ensued. The last time we had a bat in the house was close to 25 years ago. Justin and I tackled that bat wearing raincoats and laundry baskets over our heads. We swung brooms while the bat circled my bedroom till it finally flew out the window.
We approached this bat the same way and Justin was dispatched to the basement for baskets. I picked up a trash can, cardboard box lid, and a flat plastic lid. Steve found my fabric cutting board. Colin wrapped a shirt around his head, just in case and April stayed calm and filmed the first capture.
Steve and Colin hunted for the critter among the bedding, curtains and Evan's bag and we finally found it hanging on the wall.
Standing on the bed, Colin placed the first basket over the bat and tried to move it toward the open window. However, since we have rounded logs, there are always spaces for it to escape and soon it was swooping right toward April and Steve. After a few loops, it returned to its spot. This time, Colin slid the cutting board under the basket to prevent it from escaping. Good idea, but its little foot got caught and it started a panicked cry. Soon, it worked its way out of a hole in the basket and began spinning around the room again.
On the next try, we used a different basket with smaller holes and they trapped it inside the basket on the floor. That didn't last long because it began to escape through the tiniest of holes. Colin put the trash can over the spot and Steve slid the cardboard lid over the basket till it was trapped inside a small bathroom trash can. Then, Colin closed one window and Steve tossed the trash can outside and quickly closed that window too. Success!
So, now it's 2:00 am and we are all wide awake with hearts pounding and adrenaline rushing, except Kaoru, who managed to sleep through most of the event. We spent the next half hour retelling stories, most notably Brad's capture of a bat on our anniversary years ago that bit him twice. He released the bat and had to have rabies shots in both hands. Then, there was that time when Justin and I battled that bat many years ago. It took two days to get it out of the house. On the second day at dusk we waited on the sofa for it to reappear. Watching the ceiling closely, we were horrified when it flew out from between the couch cushions where we were sitting! April told the story of her father shooting one in her bedroom with a BB gun.
Evan decided to spend the night on the sofa, but got very little sleep. Molly was awake at dawn and cried at the basement door till he got up and released her. Then, she had to snuggle with him and there was no more sleeping. We're all a bit dopey tonight and will sleep very well, I'm sure.
All in all, it was an unforgettable night that provided a memorable story we'll retell for many years to come!
Then crash, a pounding on the door. I bolted from bed and ran to the door. "There's a bat in Evan's room!" three voices announced. What? Bats? In the winter? How on earth did that get inside?
I threw on jeans and a fleece and headed upstairs. There's Evan wrapped in a blanket. Colin had quickly taken out the storm windows and opened the windows, hoping the bat would fly out. Evan had been awakened by flapping over head and slid from bed encased in his blanket.
A strategy session ensued. The last time we had a bat in the house was close to 25 years ago. Justin and I tackled that bat wearing raincoats and laundry baskets over our heads. We swung brooms while the bat circled my bedroom till it finally flew out the window.
We approached this bat the same way and Justin was dispatched to the basement for baskets. I picked up a trash can, cardboard box lid, and a flat plastic lid. Steve found my fabric cutting board. Colin wrapped a shirt around his head, just in case and April stayed calm and filmed the first capture.
Steve and Colin hunted for the critter among the bedding, curtains and Evan's bag and we finally found it hanging on the wall.
Standing on the bed, Colin placed the first basket over the bat and tried to move it toward the open window. However, since we have rounded logs, there are always spaces for it to escape and soon it was swooping right toward April and Steve. After a few loops, it returned to its spot. This time, Colin slid the cutting board under the basket to prevent it from escaping. Good idea, but its little foot got caught and it started a panicked cry. Soon, it worked its way out of a hole in the basket and began spinning around the room again.
On the next try, we used a different basket with smaller holes and they trapped it inside the basket on the floor. That didn't last long because it began to escape through the tiniest of holes. Colin put the trash can over the spot and Steve slid the cardboard lid over the basket till it was trapped inside a small bathroom trash can. Then, Colin closed one window and Steve tossed the trash can outside and quickly closed that window too. Success!
So, now it's 2:00 am and we are all wide awake with hearts pounding and adrenaline rushing, except Kaoru, who managed to sleep through most of the event. We spent the next half hour retelling stories, most notably Brad's capture of a bat on our anniversary years ago that bit him twice. He released the bat and had to have rabies shots in both hands. Then, there was that time when Justin and I battled that bat many years ago. It took two days to get it out of the house. On the second day at dusk we waited on the sofa for it to reappear. Watching the ceiling closely, we were horrified when it flew out from between the couch cushions where we were sitting! April told the story of her father shooting one in her bedroom with a BB gun.
Evan decided to spend the night on the sofa, but got very little sleep. Molly was awake at dawn and cried at the basement door till he got up and released her. Then, she had to snuggle with him and there was no more sleeping. We're all a bit dopey tonight and will sleep very well, I'm sure.
All in all, it was an unforgettable night that provided a memorable story we'll retell for many years to come!
A wonderful family dinner tonight!
Thursday, December 22, 2016
Day 1812: Gathering the troops
Three more members of our family arrived about 6:15 and dove into a fabulous dinner.
Unfortunately, Colin and April were meeting friends for dinner tonight.
Tomorrow, roast beef and Yorkshire pudding!
Old Molly, sleeping under the Christmas tree
Wednesday, December 21, 2016
Day 1811: Student leaders 2017
So many applications! Thirty from Fredonia including a dozen freshmen, four veterans from Brocton, three girls from Silver Creek including two veterans. Then late tonight Kelly arrived with a stack of nine applications from Cassadaga. So, that's a total of 46! It's so thrilling to know that so many teens want to return as student leaders! Unfortunately, we won't be able to accept all of them and will have to cut twenty.
Kelly helped us sift through the nine applicants. One is a junior who transferred from Fredonia after working two years as a SL. He's a definite. Then, two boys who were in our hike group were extremely helpful, eager to learn and dependable. Two more are possibilities, but we have to see how many kids enroll. Several kids threw the application form together today after school as an afterthought. They went to the bottom of the pile.
There's no doubt on the Brocton pros. They are outstanding young people who have proven leadership abilities. Even if very few eighth graders enroll from Brocton, I would still want them to be part of our team. Same thing with the Silver Creek gals. The two pros are quiet and reserved, but good teachers. One is a freshman, a younger sister, and she also will be a fine addition. They all grew in skills and knowledge last season. This is an opportunity for them to discover more about themselves and become fine young leaders.
The toughest job will be deciding on the Fredonia applicants. That will take a few days and consultations with the teachers they listed as references. The hardest part will be deciding on the freshmen. Should we take any at all?
It was a very low key day. April worked much of the day while Colin watched Lord of the Rings: Return of the Kings. I baked coconut macaroons for April and she gobbled up a bunch. Tomorrow, Steve will bake chocolate chip cookies for Evan and I'll make a fancy dinner.
Evan, Justin and Kaoru will arrive by supper time and finally the whole family will be reunited. Hooray!
Kelly helped us sift through the nine applicants. One is a junior who transferred from Fredonia after working two years as a SL. He's a definite. Then, two boys who were in our hike group were extremely helpful, eager to learn and dependable. Two more are possibilities, but we have to see how many kids enroll. Several kids threw the application form together today after school as an afterthought. They went to the bottom of the pile.
There's no doubt on the Brocton pros. They are outstanding young people who have proven leadership abilities. Even if very few eighth graders enroll from Brocton, I would still want them to be part of our team. Same thing with the Silver Creek gals. The two pros are quiet and reserved, but good teachers. One is a freshman, a younger sister, and she also will be a fine addition. They all grew in skills and knowledge last season. This is an opportunity for them to discover more about themselves and become fine young leaders.
The toughest job will be deciding on the Fredonia applicants. That will take a few days and consultations with the teachers they listed as references. The hardest part will be deciding on the freshmen. Should we take any at all?
It was a very low key day. April worked much of the day while Colin watched Lord of the Rings: Return of the Kings. I baked coconut macaroons for April and she gobbled up a bunch. Tomorrow, Steve will bake chocolate chip cookies for Evan and I'll make a fancy dinner.
Evan, Justin and Kaoru will arrive by supper time and finally the whole family will be reunited. Hooray!
Tuesday, December 20, 2016
Day 1810: Old friends
Colin and April are making the rounds to see family and friends while they are home this week. I'm so happy we can provide the home base for their visits cause we get breakfast and lunch and late night. They fill in the prime hours with folks far and near. Today, they drove to Olean to see April's grandparents and once they returned a group of friends arrived here. All evening, the house has been filled with laughter and lively conversation. They don't get much time together any more, so this was special. What a delight! Steve was out doing interviews, so I hit the bed to give them space and privacy. Then, I did something wicked. I let Paddy curl up on the bed with me and we took a nap together.
We finished all the wrapping today so tomorrow will be dedicated to baking. April likes coconut macaroons and Evan loves chocolate chip. That's plenty of calories for the week.
We finished all the wrapping today so tomorrow will be dedicated to baking. April likes coconut macaroons and Evan loves chocolate chip. That's plenty of calories for the week.
Monday, December 19, 2016
Day 1809: Electoral College
It's official. And nauseating. DT. No avoiding it now.
Plus, the Russian ambassador to Turkey was assassinated today by a man who shouted, "Remember Syria! Remember Aleppo!"
Plus, a dozen people were killed in a Berlin Christmas market when a person drove into the crowds. They are blaming terrorism and the German embrace of refugees.
I didn't even write about the confrontation with the Chinese.
Disturbing news and a frightening trend for the future. So, probably no sleep tonight.
Plus, the Russian ambassador to Turkey was assassinated today by a man who shouted, "Remember Syria! Remember Aleppo!"
Plus, a dozen people were killed in a Berlin Christmas market when a person drove into the crowds. They are blaming terrorism and the German embrace of refugees.
I didn't even write about the confrontation with the Chinese.
Disturbing news and a frightening trend for the future. So, probably no sleep tonight.
Sunday, December 18, 2016
Saturday, December 17, 2016
Friday, December 16, 2016
Day 1806: Keeping perspective
Throughout the night, a high pitched whining noise pierced our sleep and raised alarms. I thought it was the white noise machine, but Steve got up early and found it was a valve on the supply lines to the upstairs. The plumber came in early afternoon and discovered the engine of the valve is faulty. Because it is an old unit, they would have to drain the system upstairs from each section upstairs and then cut the supply pipe to replace the motor. That would take couple hours and a few hundred dollars for labor. Of course this has to happen when Colin and April are coming home tomorrow. There is still heat upstairs as long as the downstairs thermostats are calling for heat. We'd let the wood stove cool off earlier in the evening so the thermostat would continue to call for heat. Complicated.
So, what should we do? We planned on replacing the furnace later this year when the weather is warmer, but it makes sense to do it now. If they install a new boiler, we get all new valves and they can drain the entire system from the basement. However, they are totally booked for about two weeks with people who have no heat at all. We can wait. Amy has a few space heaters we can borrow if the rooms get too cold upstairs.
Steve injured his back on Wednesday and was not able to get into the chiropractor until Monday. He is in misery. So, I went off shopping on my own which was a pleasure cause I do it at a much more leisurely pace.
At the checkout counter, i ran into an old friend, a woman I knew when our kids were growing up and swimming together. I barely recognized her until she spoke. My heart nearly broke seeing her with a scarf over her bald head and her face swollen. Chemotherapy, she said. She's being evaluated next week and then will know whether she is done or needs three more treatments. She joked that her husband suggested she get a wig for going out. "F---, I don't want a wig!" But, she confided, "I have one they can bury me in." I couldn't hug her because of the germs, but I wished her well and I fervently hope she can beat her cancer.
It was an important jolt for me. I must remember all my many blessings, most especially my good health. I can't ever forget that I have the strength to continue the fight when so many others can't.
So, what should we do? We planned on replacing the furnace later this year when the weather is warmer, but it makes sense to do it now. If they install a new boiler, we get all new valves and they can drain the entire system from the basement. However, they are totally booked for about two weeks with people who have no heat at all. We can wait. Amy has a few space heaters we can borrow if the rooms get too cold upstairs.
Steve injured his back on Wednesday and was not able to get into the chiropractor until Monday. He is in misery. So, I went off shopping on my own which was a pleasure cause I do it at a much more leisurely pace.
At the checkout counter, i ran into an old friend, a woman I knew when our kids were growing up and swimming together. I barely recognized her until she spoke. My heart nearly broke seeing her with a scarf over her bald head and her face swollen. Chemotherapy, she said. She's being evaluated next week and then will know whether she is done or needs three more treatments. She joked that her husband suggested she get a wig for going out. "F---, I don't want a wig!" But, she confided, "I have one they can bury me in." I couldn't hug her because of the germs, but I wished her well and I fervently hope she can beat her cancer.
It was an important jolt for me. I must remember all my many blessings, most especially my good health. I can't ever forget that I have the strength to continue the fight when so many others can't.
A beautiful Christmas arrangement from our friends Amy and Dan.
Another reminder of our good fortune.
Thursday, December 15, 2016
Day 1805: CC WAG
Chautauqua County Women's Action Group: Awesome! We spent most of the time preparing for our participation in the National Women's March on Jan. 21. I knew everyone present except for one young woman. We spoke of logistics and protocols, our personal priorities, safety measures and practical matters. We discussed long term strategic goals and how to get off the couch and do more than email or write checks. Very satisfying.
And I got to have lunch with my lifelong friends, Judy and Claude. For the first time in all the years I have known him, Claude shared the story of his grandparents who lived in Paris during the early years of World War II. Both sets were rounded up by the Nazis and transported to Auschwitz. They never saw them again. His parents survived and ultimately fled to Venezuela. They were fortunate they were accepted as refugees, unlike so many Syrians who are trapped and dying in Aleppo.
And I got to have lunch with my lifelong friends, Judy and Claude. For the first time in all the years I have known him, Claude shared the story of his grandparents who lived in Paris during the early years of World War II. Both sets were rounded up by the Nazis and transported to Auschwitz. They never saw them again. His parents survived and ultimately fled to Venezuela. They were fortunate they were accepted as refugees, unlike so many Syrians who are trapped and dying in Aleppo.
Wednesday, December 14, 2016
Day 1804: Floors and walls
Another busy day, filled with projects and a reunion meeting that no one else attended. So, what happened there? Picked up some more flooring samples, met with Terry, who will install the new flooring and then occupied my mind with Christmas activities. That eased my mind a bit. If only I could go outside and work in my garden or swim a mile. The exercise would help me escape the confines of these walls. Didn't sleep again last night, got up at 6:30 for the day because my mind won't stop.
In the first draft, after this passage, I wrote a long bitter paragraph about the world politics of the day. I deleted it because I won't let myself be drawn into despair, although at times it washes over me. But, our sons will be home soon and joy will rein!
Tomorrow night, I'll join with fifty other women just like me and we'll plot our strategy to take back our country, regain the House of Representatives and send DT into the history books as the first president tried and convicted of high crimes against this nation. Now, that will help me sleep.
In the first draft, after this passage, I wrote a long bitter paragraph about the world politics of the day. I deleted it because I won't let myself be drawn into despair, although at times it washes over me. But, our sons will be home soon and joy will rein!
Tomorrow night, I'll join with fifty other women just like me and we'll plot our strategy to take back our country, regain the House of Representatives and send DT into the history books as the first president tried and convicted of high crimes against this nation. Now, that will help me sleep.
December 15, 2007, the day Colin and April got engaged.
What an amazing journey they've had together!
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
Day 1803: Feeding an army
Wegman's, Marshall's and Premier. No time for Kohl's or Target. Crazed shopping to get ready for the holidays and feeding our family for ten days. Wegman's was so busy we left before we were finished. I love the selection and quality, but the layout is so confusing that we keep wandering around like lost children. Turkey, ham, pork tenderloins, fruit, vegetables, drinks. They aren't fussy, but I do like to please them.
Plus, the decorating is done! Lots of progress today. Spent some time going back through old photos and found these gems.
Plus, the decorating is done! Lots of progress today. Spent some time going back through old photos and found these gems.
One of the few digital photos I took in Uzbekistan in July 2000.
Family photo is March 2002
BB = Before beards!
Monday, December 12, 2016
Day 1802: Russian hacking
We've known for months that the Russians were trying to influence the outcome of the US election in favor of DT. Yesterday and today, the CIA confirmed it and yet there is little outrage. A foreign nation acts openly to sway the election and the response is wishy washy. It took 24 hours for Mitch McConnell to call for an investigation, but he knew before the election and threatened action if the White House released the information. He and Paul Ryan are the most sickening of panderers and sycophants. DT of course denies it and blames the Democrats for the story. He claims they are embarrassed by his landslide in the Electoral College. NOT. Of 56 elections, 44 had bigger margins than he does. Ten members of the Electoral College have asked for an intelligence briefing before they deliberate next Monday.
There is tremendous fascination with Vladimir Putin in this new administration. Tonight they announced that DT will nominate Rex Tillerson for Secretary of State. He's the man who has been president of Exxon Mobile and is best friends with Putin. Disgusting. My plan: call it like it is, the Putin-Trump administration.
In other news, decorating is going well. Pictures don't want to upload.
There is tremendous fascination with Vladimir Putin in this new administration. Tonight they announced that DT will nominate Rex Tillerson for Secretary of State. He's the man who has been president of Exxon Mobile and is best friends with Putin. Disgusting. My plan: call it like it is, the Putin-Trump administration.
In other news, decorating is going well. Pictures don't want to upload.
Sunday, December 11, 2016
Day 1801: Home and exhausted
The trip home was not as difficult as Friday's, but we are exhausted anyway. From Columbus to Cleveland there was only a little snow and the roads were slushy. The area about thirty miles around Cleveland was a mess and then Erie was bad too. When we arrived at my brother's house on Webster Rd, that was the worst of all!
Steve was a trooper again and got us through this mess successfully.
I'm dizzy just from watching the traffic and mucky roads.
Saturday, December 10, 2016
Day 1800: Christmas in Columbus
It's very late and we're so tired, but it's a happy tired. We had a full day together. Sisters, brothers, nephew and nieces. Games, good food, a Chinese lantern show at the fair grounds, shopping, presents, laughter and fun. Pictures tomorrow.
I'm writing under a pillow so the light doesn't disturb Steve. We have another dangerous trip ahead of us tomorrow and he needs his rest. There's supposed to be snow all the way to Fredonia. Hope we make it home safely.
I'm writing under a pillow so the light doesn't disturb Steve. We have another dangerous trip ahead of us tomorrow and he needs his rest. There's supposed to be snow all the way to Fredonia. Hope we make it home safely.
Chinese lanterns on display
Each piece is composed of welded metal covered by a sheer sturdy fabric. Then each piece is electrified and artists add finishing details with paint.
Friday, December 9, 2016
Day 1799: Brutal drive
Rough day on the road! From the state line to just south of Cleveland, we drove in and out of intense lake effect snow bands. Broken hulks of semi trailers, shattered fragments of chassis and loose tires littered the medians and the highwyays' shoulders for miles. We were so fortunate to make it all the way to Columbus without a serious incident. Steve earned a gold medal today!
It even took twenty minutes just to get through the village cause none of the roads were plowed. What a mess. But, once we arrived it has been relaxing and fun to be with my sisters and brother.
It even took twenty minutes just to get through the village cause none of the roads were plowed. What a mess. But, once we arrived it has been relaxing and fun to be with my sisters and brother.
Thursday, December 8, 2016
Day 1798: First snow of the season
Our youngest son, Colin, turns 33 tomorrow. He was born on his due date after just nine hours of labor, but it was still really tough. Every day of his life, he has given us great joy, except maybe for the day in October 2002 when he told us he had enlisted in the army. He's always had a unique perspective on life and a great sense of humor which keeps us laughing. He's sweet, kind, hardworking, highly principled and highly attuned to injustice. He picked the perfect wife and we couldn't love her more.
April and Colin at home in LA in 2016
Visiting home for a wedding in 2013.
Wednesday, December 7, 2016
Day 1797: A labor of love
Well, what night! We had a packed house tonight. An additional 22 Fredonia parents, plus a few from Silver Creek and Cassadaga showed up. So, we're up to 59 Fredonia, eleven from Cassadaga, four from Brocton and six from Silver Creek. There's no certainty that all the students whose parents attended will enroll. It's very likely ten or so will not follow through. Even so, we could hit seventy eighth grade hikers. I always get very pumped up at these meetings, but I'm very glad we're done!
We got the Christmas tree out of the attic without any swearing. It's so heavy that Steve lowers it down the attic stairs and I keep it from crashing. We set it up, but will not decorate till next week.
Thirty-seven years ago at this time I was in my nineteenth hour of labor. It started at 4:30 am on Dec. 7 and Evan was born at 4:30 am on the 8th. Brutal, but worth every minute! Happy birthday, Evan!
We got the Christmas tree out of the attic without any swearing. It's so heavy that Steve lowers it down the attic stairs and I keep it from crashing. We set it up, but will not decorate till next week.
Thirty-seven years ago at this time I was in my nineteenth hour of labor. It started at 4:30 am on Dec. 7 and Evan was born at 4:30 am on the 8th. Brutal, but worth every minute! Happy birthday, Evan!
July 22, 2013
July 2, 2013
Evan and Alexandra
Tuesday, December 6, 2016
Day 1796: Getting Christmasy
A little decorating and wrapping today means I'm feeling a bit more Christmasy. Gifts are ready for my sisters, niece and nephews. Can't wait to see them this weekend, if the storm doesn't prevent us from traveling.
It was warm enough to spend a couple hours outside which always makes me happy. I cleaned up the remaining pots between the house and garage in preparation for a big snowfall. I still have dill and cilantro, asparagus ferns, petunias, celery and other herbs growing in the gardens and containers!
Silver Creek parents were wonderful, but only four attended the meeting tonight. Josh had hoped for ten, so he was frustrated too. I must say they had the best questions. Another delightful surprise came when one of the dads walked in with his son and I knew him as a former student! That's five so far this year.
It was warm enough to spend a couple hours outside which always makes me happy. I cleaned up the remaining pots between the house and garage in preparation for a big snowfall. I still have dill and cilantro, asparagus ferns, petunias, celery and other herbs growing in the gardens and containers!
Silver Creek parents were wonderful, but only four attended the meeting tonight. Josh had hoped for ten, so he was frustrated too. I must say they had the best questions. Another delightful surprise came when one of the dads walked in with his son and I knew him as a former student! That's five so far this year.
Monday, December 5, 2016
Day 1795: Novel Women
Scheduling conflicts made it necessary to split my time between our annual book club Christmas party and the parent meeting in Brocton. We were having such a good time catching up and then boom, I had to leave.
The worst part was only four Brocton parents and one Fredonia parent came. They seemed very receptive but concerned about the conflict with the Chautauqua County Music Festival in May as well as softball games. I had really hope they would break the threshold of 5 that they've maintained since 2009. Two more meetings to go. I asked student leaders to visit with the eighth graders on Tuesday and Wednesday during lunch and Bryan is reminding them during class. Those efforts are on top of the personal letter to every parent, two meetings with the kids and ten announcements. It's exasperating!
We started the Christmas decorating today, a bit listlessly, but we forged ahead for our kids. I have no enthusiasm for hanging garlands or arranging bulbs, beads and birds.
I missed the picture with my pals!
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Day 1794: Potluck
Penelope met this morning and it was very satisfying. First, we honored Sara who was chosen as a featured artist for the 50th anniversary celebration of the Burchfield Penney Art Center in Buffalo. Tomorrow, nine pieces will be installed in preparation for the opening on Friday. Her work is so complex and beautiful. She creates fabric art that is a compilation of drawings, photography and cheesecloth fabric that are abstracted, layered and reimagined. It's an extraordinary achievement because there are many artists in Western NY and she was one of the ten selected.
They are all in favor of self-publishing. After my conversation with a friend who has published two books through CreateSpace, I am more seriously considering it. I would have full ownership of the project, it's faster, and I can edit or update as often as I wish. They use print-on-demand to reduce costs and it publishes as an e-book. I know for sure that I want it done this year. I have many other projects in mind so I'd like this one to be completed and published. Eight years to write it and a year to publish is quite enough.
Carolyn wrote an excellent poem that related the tale of why she stopped writing about five years ago. She is so talented and I've missed her work. Penny wrote a really funny poem featuring heads of state: Simon Bolivar the Liberator, Peter the Great, Vlad the Impaler, Abraham Lincoln the Emancipator, Elizabeth the Virgin Queen, Suleiman the Magnificent, Trump the Tweeter.
A small group of friends came over for a potluck dinner and "a safe space" where we could laugh, tell stories and commiserate. Mike made a salad with a delicious dressing which I ate with gusto. As they were leaving, I asked for the ingredients. Mayonnaise and anchovies! I had no idea! I never eat either of those things, but it was delicious.
They are all in favor of self-publishing. After my conversation with a friend who has published two books through CreateSpace, I am more seriously considering it. I would have full ownership of the project, it's faster, and I can edit or update as often as I wish. They use print-on-demand to reduce costs and it publishes as an e-book. I know for sure that I want it done this year. I have many other projects in mind so I'd like this one to be completed and published. Eight years to write it and a year to publish is quite enough.
Carolyn wrote an excellent poem that related the tale of why she stopped writing about five years ago. She is so talented and I've missed her work. Penny wrote a really funny poem featuring heads of state: Simon Bolivar the Liberator, Peter the Great, Vlad the Impaler, Abraham Lincoln the Emancipator, Elizabeth the Virgin Queen, Suleiman the Magnificent, Trump the Tweeter.
A small group of friends came over for a potluck dinner and "a safe space" where we could laugh, tell stories and commiserate. Mike made a salad with a delicious dressing which I ate with gusto. As they were leaving, I asked for the ingredients. Mayonnaise and anchovies! I had no idea! I never eat either of those things, but it was delicious.
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Day 1793: Molly snoring
A remarkable turn of events. Molly is snoring in the chair next to me. She woke up this morning, ate breakfast, and returned to her normal routine. Her eye is still filled with blood, but she does not act like she is in pain. She still slept most of the day away, but that's her usual pattern. What a tremendous relief. I'm so glad the boys and April will get to see her again at the holidays.
We held another parent meeting in Fredonia this morning, but this one was disappointing. The numbers are so low again. Only ten sets of parents, one from Cassadaga and nine from Fredonia. That means only 35 total from Fredonia and ten from Cassadaga.
We spoke with Chris from Silver Creek and he agreed that the hardest part of any activity is getting the parents to participate. I understand they have many obligations and struggle to balance all the needs of their children with daily living. It's tough. However, I also know the importance and value of this experience, so it's tough for me to reconcile the two. We always got involved in whatever our kids wanted to do. I guess it's not the way people operate today.
For the first time, we went to the Empty Bowls program sponsored by the Chautauqua Area Potter's Association to benefit area food pantries. Many bowls were made by kids from local schools, while others were made by professionals. I bought fifteen that we plan to give to family and friends. After picking out bowls, we were ushered into another huge room where we were served soup made by the culinary students at BOCES. The Italian wedding cake was delicious!
Mary came for dinner tonight. She gets so busy at the college that we hardly see her all semester. We ate chili and talked so much we hardly took a breath. How blessed I am to have her as my sister-in-law. She truly is a sister from another mother.
We held another parent meeting in Fredonia this morning, but this one was disappointing. The numbers are so low again. Only ten sets of parents, one from Cassadaga and nine from Fredonia. That means only 35 total from Fredonia and ten from Cassadaga.
We spoke with Chris from Silver Creek and he agreed that the hardest part of any activity is getting the parents to participate. I understand they have many obligations and struggle to balance all the needs of their children with daily living. It's tough. However, I also know the importance and value of this experience, so it's tough for me to reconcile the two. We always got involved in whatever our kids wanted to do. I guess it's not the way people operate today.
For the first time, we went to the Empty Bowls program sponsored by the Chautauqua Area Potter's Association to benefit area food pantries. Many bowls were made by kids from local schools, while others were made by professionals. I bought fifteen that we plan to give to family and friends. After picking out bowls, we were ushered into another huge room where we were served soup made by the culinary students at BOCES. The Italian wedding cake was delicious!
Mary came for dinner tonight. She gets so busy at the college that we hardly see her all semester. We ate chili and talked so much we hardly took a breath. How blessed I am to have her as my sister-in-law. She truly is a sister from another mother.
Friday, December 2, 2016
Day 1792: Molly Kay
Molly is in rough shape. At 18 years nine months old, we recognize that she is approaching her final years, but we did not think she would turn the corner so abruptly. She did not come upstairs for breakfast this morning, instead preferred to sleep downstairs. When we checked on her, she was responsive but sleepy. At noon, still no Molly. At 4:00, I found her curled up next to the basement radiator. Her eye was full of blood and fluid was draining from it. We rushed her to the vet, but he couldn't find anything conclusive. He thinks perhaps her kidneys are failing, so her blood pressure is up. That may have caused blood vessels in her eye to break. Her gave her a shot of antibiotic and vitamin B12 plus drops for her eye. It's now been 24 hours since she has eaten anything and she's had very little to drink. I'm afraid this may be her last night.
Molly sleeping under the Christmas tree in 2014.
She always has loved Christmas.
Thursday, December 1, 2016
Day 1791: Cassadaga parents
Again this year, Cassadaga parents and staff welcomed us warmly. Only nine families were represented, but those that came to the meeting were enthusiastic, engaged and excited. Amazingly, there were two more of my former students there with their daughters. David graduated in 1991 and DJ in 1996. DJ said that backpacking was one of the few things he remembers about middle school. Then another dad is Chris' nephew, so his daughter is all set with her gear already. And another dad said he lives along the route and he remembers us hiking by. They all stayed to visit and three of them signed up to help with the supply truck.
We also met Corinne, the new young science teacher who replaced Kelly as the 8th grade teacher. They are going to work on contacting more families and conducting additional parent meetings if necessary.
When we finished, we drove home in the first snow storm and I felt better than I have in days. I started investigating other publishers and that is a depressing job. It took so long to write the book that it's very hard to dig back in for another long haul.
We also met Corinne, the new young science teacher who replaced Kelly as the 8th grade teacher. They are going to work on contacting more families and conducting additional parent meetings if necessary.
When we finished, we drove home in the first snow storm and I felt better than I have in days. I started investigating other publishers and that is a depressing job. It took so long to write the book that it's very hard to dig back in for another long haul.
The temperature dropped twenty degrees today. It's a good thing I mowed and mulched yesterday.
Overnight, heavy rain fell and refilled the creek. Too bad it didn't happen weeks ago when the poor steelhead were struggling to swim upstream in just a trickle of water.
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